Seven years ago, I was deep in the trenches of new motherhood, feeling like I had to say all the right things, do all the right things, and keep it all together. Looking back now, it’s wild how much I’ve grown—not just as a mom, but as a person. The things I once believed or worried about have shifted, and with time and experience, I see them in a new light.
So here’s a little "then vs. now" reflection, because if I could go back, here’s what I’d tell myself…
Then: I need to be the perfect mom.
Now: I'm enough as I am. Perfect doesn’t exist—present and loving does.
Then: I have to do everything by myself.
Now: It’s okay to ask for help. It takes a village, and that’s a good thing.
Then: I should always have it together.
Now: It’s okay to have hard days, messy days, and days where you just get through.
Then: I do not want them to see me struggling.
Now: It’s okay for them to see me struggle. Life has challenges, but we keep going, and it’s okay to ask for help.
Then: OMG, I will never feel like me again.
Now: I’m still me, but a more expanded version. Motherhood hasn’t erased me, it’s added layers.
Then: Ugh, we haven't done it in months... I guess our mojo is dead.
Now: Our connection isn’t just physical. Intimacy can ebb and flow—it’s the long game that matters.
Then: Shop closed.
Now: The shop is on a flexible schedule! Priorities shift, but the spark is still there. We find our way back to each other.
Then: Why do I always have to do this? Like put the kids to bed.
Now: It’s exhausting, but these moments won’t last forever. I can ask for help and remind myself that bedtime might be the sweetest part of my day.
Then: OMG, I’ve been eating like a pig, pig is me.
Now: I deserve to nourish myself. Some days it’s cake, some days it’s veggies, and both are fine.
Then: I can’t do this.
Now: It’s hard, but I can do it, and I will do it. I’ve already overcome so much.
Then: How do I get this cool mom to like me?
Now: I’m enough just as I am. I don’t need to mold myself to fit in. If they don’t see my worth, they’re not my people.
Then: What if I fail?
Now: Failure is part of the process. It’s how I learn and grow. Fear won’t hold me back anymore.
Then: What if my child gets hurt?
Now: I can’t protect them from everything. But I can give them the tools to navigate the world, trust in their resilience, and be there when they need me.
Then: What if I’m not doing enough?
Now: I am doing more than enough. My kids don’t need a superhero; they need a present, loving parent. That’s more than enough.
Then: What if my kids don’t turn out okay?
Now: I can only guide them. The rest is up to them and life. I trust that they will find their way, just as I did.
Then: I’m going to lose myself in motherhood.
Now: Motherhood is part of me, but not all of me. I make space for my passions, my career, and my relationships. I’m still me, just with more depth.
Then: I don’t know what I’m doing!
Now: None of us do at first. Parenting is a learning journey, and I get better with time and experience. It’s okay not to have it all figured out.
But as I stand here now, I see that so much of what I used to worry about didn’t need to be perfect. I didn’t need to have all the answers. I just needed to be me and trust that I was enough, as a mom, wife, and woman.
It’s amazing to look back and see how much things have shifted, isn’t it? Motherhood, marriage, and life itself have a way of evolving us—sometimes in the quiet moments and sometimes in the messy, loud ones.
Here’s to growing, learning, and embracing the now 💛 #MommyThoughts #GrowthJourney #LifeWillTell